September 1995 Newsletter
Dear Friend,
I greet you today with truly gratifying news. My efforts at getting published have been met. Prima Publishing has bought my book, Bride’s Guide to Emotional Survival. Not surprisingly, I’m hard at work with my excellent Editor, Georgia Hughes, putting on the finishing touches. If all goes well you’ll find me in the stores by the winter of ‘96. I think you’ll all agree that It feels truly wonderful to achieve a meaningful goal.
I am delighted to reveal to you that I’m one of the lucky ones. Someone who truly loves my profession. Daily I am challenged to find the right key that will unearth a client’s own rich fund of resources and solutions to problems. Often the answer lies not in psycho pathology, but in philosophy. One recurring question that begs to be answered is, WHAT IS THE MEANING OF LIFE? In order to survive some of the rigorous challenges we need to find meaning in our suffering. I was recently inspired to explore these ideas as a result of studying Irvin Yalom’s, EXISTENTIAL PSYCHOTHERAPY, and Victor Frankl’s contributions to this topic.
I truly hope this issue opens some doors for you.
With personal regards,
Rita
Birth Is A Beginning by: Alvin I. Fine
Birth is a beginning
And death a destination.
And life is a journey:
From childhood to maturity
And youth to age;
From innocence to awareness
And ignorance to knowing;
From foolishness to discretion
And then perhaps to wisdom;
From weakness to strength
Or strength to weakness —
And, often back again;
From health to sickness
And back, we pray, to health again;
From offense to forgiveness,
From loneliness to love,
From joy to gratitude,
From pain to compassion,
And grief to understanding —
From fear to faith’
From defeat to defeat to defeat —
Until, looking backward or ahead,
We see that victory lives
Not at some high place along the way,
But in having made the journey, stage by stage,
A sacred pilgrimage.
Birth is a beginning
And death a destination
But life is a journey,
A sacred pilgrimage —
To life everlasting.
THE MEANING OF LIFE
According to Yalom, philosophers are in agreement that people find meaning by immersing themselves in the stream of life. Pursuing some of the following activities (that are intrinsically satisfying) provides individuals with a sense of purpose in life.
Altruism. Participating in charity, giving to others, and leaving the world a better place provides meaning through activities that are right and good. One is lifted out of his/her private world, and becomes part of a larger system. In this way leaving our mark in life.
Dedication To A Cause. There is an altruistic component in this path. A variety of causes can help us to find meaning in life by contributing to something noble: family, country, politics, religion and science. The psychiatrist Carl Jung said, "meaning makes a great many things endurable — perhaps everything."
Creativity. The idea of inventing something new that can be beautiful, interesting or harmonious, is a powerful cure for feelings of emptiness and purposelessness. Beauty needs no justification. It is intrinsically good and right to devote oneself to art, music, literature or science. Similarly, a creative approach to any work or play situation always generates satisfaction.
Hedonism. Living life continuously, appreciating the miracle of life, searching for pleasure by diving fully into the natural rhythm of life — this can give life great meaning. Yalom quoted a humanistic psychology idea, "Life is a gift. Take it, unwrap it, appreciate it, use it, and enjoy it."
Self-Actualization. Many individuals find personal meaning in dedicating themselves to fulfilling their natural potential. According to Abraham Maslow, self-actualization is the psychological reaching towards growth and becoming the best one can be. In this way, the individual is motivated towards seeking knowledge, insight, wisdom, beauty, harmony, creativity, meditation, integration and congruence. The danger here is that an exaggerated focus on oneself limits one’s happiness in life. The fully actualized person knows that in addition to having a firm grip on one’s own sense of self, true satisfaction requires reaching outside oneself and caring for another.
Self-Transcendence And The Life Cycle. Throughout one’s life there is an ongoing change in meaning. Early adulthood concerns are self-generated and related to finding a firm identity, developing intimate relationships and achieving professional success. Later in life, mature individuals find meaning in their concerns with their own children, and in caring for others through charitable work.
"Live all you can; it’s a mistake not to. It doesn’t so much matter what you do in particular, so long as you have had your life. If you haven’t had that what have you had?...What one loses one loses; make no mistake about that ...The right time is any time that one is still so lucky as to have...Live!"
Henry James - The Ambassadors 1903
Food For Thought
The following is extricated from Crumbaugh’s and Maholick’s psychometric instrument designed to measure purpose in life. Please complete each sentence and get to know yourself a bit better.
Life to me is...
Every day is...
If I could choose, I would...
After retiring, I would...
If I should die today, I would feel that my life has been...
As I view the world in relation to my life, the world...
Concerning an individual’s freedom to make his/her own choices, I believe...
I regard my ability to find a meaning, a purpose, or mission in life as...
Regarding my sense of control over my life, I feel...
